Dirty Jokes

 

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Joke: A man goes to his male doctor after several tests and tells him, "Give it to me straight doc!"

The doctor replies, "That's impossible, we're both male."

They both laugh and the doctor says, "Besides, I don't want HIV."


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Joke: A man goes into a library and asks the librarian, "Do you have any books for dudes with little dicks?"

She replies, "We have one, I don't know if it's not in yet."

The guy frowns, "That's the one..."


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Joke: A couple has been happily married for ten years and have 4 kids. But for their entire relationship they have never had sex with the lights on because the husband refuses to ever have sex with the lights on. But one night, his wife decides to flick the lights on in the middle of sex. When she does she looks down and sees her husband using a dildo instead of his penis.

She becomes furious and yells at him, "Have you been doing this our entire relationship? You have some explaining to do!"

He looks at her, stunned, and says, "I'll explain this when you explain the kids."


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Joke: How is a 9 volt battery like your girlfriend's asshole?


Punch line: You know you shouldn't, but your gonna put your tongue on it eventually.


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Joke: Why did Victoria want to enter the boxing match with a sex change as the prize?


Punch line: So she could emerge the victor.


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