Clean Jokes

Joke: A man brings his girlfriend into his room and tells her to sit down "There is something I have to tell you."

She replies "What is it?"

He tells her "I don't want you to be my girlfriend anymore."

She immediately jumps up and screams at him "I never want to see you again!"

The man, dumbfounded, says to himself "Well that was a waste of a $5,000 engagement ring..."

Joke: The manager of a factory is looking to make the factory more cost efficient. He calls all of his employees to the floor and tells them, "The first man to come up with a great way for us to save money will get $5,000."

A man in front quickly raises his hand. The manager asks him, "That was quick, what's your idea Tom?"

Tom swiftly replies, "Make it $2,000?"

Joke: The past, present and future walked into a bar... It was tense!

Joke: What happened when the wheel was invented?

Joke: A mathematician, a statistician, and an accountant are all up for the same job. The board asks each of them the same section, "What is 100 + 200?"

The mathematician replies, "300."

The statistician replies, "300, with 95 % certainty."

The accountant says in a hushed voice, "What do you want it to be?" He gets the job.