Clean Jokes

 

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Joke: A new father is sitting down with his father for a drink. His dad tells him, "Now that you're a father yourself it's time I give you something."

He replies, "Dad, you're not talking about-."

His father interrupts, "Yes. It's time." With this he hands him a copy of '1000 Dad Jokes, 6th Edition' to his son.

He says with a tear in his eye, "Dad, I'm honored."

"Hi honored," his father replies, "I'm dad."


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Joke: A guy from Mississippi goes to Connecticut and sees some girls. He asks them, "What college do y'all go to?"

One of them responds daintily, "Yale."

He replies, "WHAT COLLEGE DO Y'ALL GO TO?"


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Joke: Why don't most buildings have a 13th floor?


Punch line: They aren't that tall.


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Joke: A man joins a golfing tournament, but he is a terrible golfer. Lucky for him an evil leprechaun lives on the course and offers him a deal, "I will make you win this tournament, if you promise to never marry!"

The man agrees and indeed wins the tournament. Afterwards the leprechaun approaches the man, "Remember, you can't marry anybody now!"

Adjusting his collar the priest replies, "Yeah, whatever."


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Joke: What is 50 cent known as in Zimbabwe?


Punch line: 100,000 dollars.


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