Clean Jokes

Joke: Two brothers, Timmy and Tommy, are very mischievous so they are sent to a religious reform school.

Almost immediately Timmy gets in trouble and is sent to the principle's office. The large principle looks at Timmy and asks "Do you know where God is?" Timmy's eyes get large but he doesn't say a word. The principle asks again louder "Do you know where God is?!" Timmy suddenly runs out of the room screaming.

Tommy discovers his brother crying in the corner of their room and asks him "What's wrong?"

Timmy responds "They don't know where God is and they think I took him!"

Joke: There was a boy named Johnny who would hang around the corner store. The other boys would pick on him, saying that he is stupid. To prove it, they would offer him a nickle or a dime. He would always pick the nickel and they would make fun of him, saying he picked it because it was bigger.

One day the store clerk asked Johnny, "Why do you always pick the nickel? That's why they make fun of you. Do you choose it because it's bigger?"

Johnny replied, "Well if I stopped picking the nickel they would stop, and I've saved up $20!"

Joke: A bartender says "We don't serve time travelers here!"

A time traveler walks into a bar.

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Moosh!
Moosh who?
Pork!

Joke: Knock knock!
who's there?
Shh!
Shh who?
Don't shoo me! I'm not an animal!