Long Jokes

Joke: A lady is on a flight from India to the United States. She stands up and yells, "Is there a doctor on board?!"

A man stands up and says, "I'm a doctor, what's the problem?"

She replies, "Want to meet my daughter?"

Joke: A man calls 911 because his wife is in labor. He yells, "My wife is in labor and her contractions are only 2 minutes apart!"

The dispatcher asks, "Is this her first child?"

The man replies, "No, I'm her husband!"

Joke: A man comes home after being out all night. When he arrives home his wife is glaring at him. She asks him, "Why did you decide to show up at 6 in the morning?"

The man stumbles a bit, and replies "I want some breakfast."

Joke: A man's boat is going down in German waters. He radios for help. On the other end he hears, "Vat is vrong?!"

The man replies, "I'm sinking! I'm sinking!"

The radio shouts back, "Okay! Vat are you sinking about?"

Joke: A man with a dog walks into a bank that has a sign reading "No dogs." A security guard walks up to him and asks "Did you read the sign? No dogs."

The man replies "I know. Someone should fix that. It should say one dog."