Good Jokes

Joke: A teacher walks into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Can I have just have a soda?"

The barkeep replies, "I don't know, CAN YOU?"

Joke: A blonde wife texts her husband while he is at work saying "Windows frozen."

He responds "Pour some room temperature water over it."

She texts him "No longer frozen, computers dead."

Joke: When can't your pencil write a check?

Joke: Why did the chemist carry solid helium everywhere he went?

Joke: At first God created Adam but Adam was lonely. He asked God, "Can you give me somebody that will care for me, listen to me, love me, make me happy, and help me through tough situations?"

God replied, "Yeah, but it'll cost you an arm and a leg."

Adam then asked, "What can I get for a rib?"