Funny Jokes

Joke: A 54-year-old man feels guilty about cheating on his wife so he leaves her a note, "I've been sleeping with a girl 1/3 my age."

The woman finds his note and leaves him one of her own: "I know you've been sleeping with an 18-year-old, but so have I. Since you like math so much, 18 goes into 54 a lot more than 54 goes into 18."

Joke: Why is the morning of January 1st the laziest morning of the year?

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Obama!
Obama who?
Obama self, can you be my friend?

Joke: What's the difference between politics and organized crime?

Joke: Bill Gates was out fishing when his pole started to jiggle. He reels in the fish and the fish asks him, "Please don't eat me, can't you throw me back?"

Bill replies, "Woah, a talking fish! I was going to throw you back anyways."

The fish swims away then turns back, "Now that you let me go, how about a wish?"

Mr. Gates replies, "Okay, what do you want?"