Funny Jokes

Joke: A prisoner promises a female guard he will marry her if she helps him get out. It is an example of somebody using a proposition to end a sentence with.

Joke: A kid is standing alone in the batter's box with a bat and a ball. He throws it up and swings at it, "Strike one!"

He throws it up again, "Strike two!"

He throws it up a third time, "Strike three! You're out!"

He grabs the ball and says, "Dang I'm a good pitcher!"

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
I can say who!
I can say who who?
Do you always have to one up me?

Joke: A man is going around stealing all of the toilets at police stations.

Police have nothing to go on.

Joke: A man smells his wife making his favorite cookies as he is about to die. He decides to crawl downstairs to get one final treat before he goes. As he reaches for one of the cookies his wife smacks his hand with the spatula, "No! Those are for the funeral."