Funny Jokes

Joke: A man and his blonde wife are sitting inside, by the fire, when the radio announcer comes on: "We are expecting up to a foot of snow tonight, please make sure you are parked on the even-numbered side of the road." The wife goes out and moves her car.

The next day the same thing happens, and the announcer comes on: "We are expecting up to a foot of snow tonight, please make sure you are parked on the odd-numbered side of the road." The wife goes out and moves her car.

A few days later the same thing happens and the announcer comes on: "We are expecting up to two feet of snow tonight, please make sure you are parked on the-" but the power goes out in the middle of the announcement.

The blonde freaks out, "Which side do I put my car on?!"

Her husband tenderly confronts her saying, "How about we just leave the car in the garage this time?"

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Ya!
Ya who?
Nope, Google.

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Doorbell repairman!
Doorbell repairman who?
Ding dong! My work here is done.

Joke: A statistician is going through security in an airport. They discover a bomb in his luggage. When they ask him about it he says "The chances a bomb are on a plane is 1/10000, but the chances that two are on the plane is 1/100000000. Just trying to be safe."

Joke: Why doesn't Superman need a manager?