Funny Jokes

Joke: How many non sequiturs does it take to change a light bulb?

Joke: What's another name for a nude beach?

Joke: A man with no arms went to a guitar shop. He grabs a guitar and asks the owner of the establishment, "How much for this one?"

The owner replies, "$300. If you don't mind me asking, how are you going to use it?"

The man replies, "I'll just play it by ear..."

Joke: Why should children never watch an orchestra?

Joke: A man in a bar sees a friend at a table drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments "You look terrible. What's the problem?"

"My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000."

"Gee, that's tough," he replied.

"Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leaving me $90,000."

"Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you're depressed."

"And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000."

"Three close family members lost in three months? How sad."

"And this month," continued, the friend sadly, "Nothing."