Dirty Jokes

Joke: Steve Irwin walks into a bar with his pet crocodile. He sets it on the counter and announces to the bar, "Let's all make a deal. I'm going to put my scrotum in the crocodile's mouth and shut it. After a minute I'll open his mouth and my testicles will be fine. If I can do it, you all get me a beer!"

The entire bar shouts their approval so he opens the crocodile's mouth, puts his genitals in, and shuts its mouth. After a minute of drinking a beer Steve takes his empty bottle and cracks the crocodile over the head with it causing him to open his mouth. Steve takes his genitals out unscathed as promised. Then he announces, "If anyone else can do it I'll give 'em $100!"

After a few minutes of silence a shy blonde woman walks over to him and says, "I'll try that, just don't hit me so hard with the bottle."

Joke: What did one tampon say to another?

Joke: Did you hear about the leper that had trouble masturbating?

Joke: What did the pirate do after his parrot bit his dick off?

Joke: What's worse than ants in your pants?