Joke: A British man, Frenchman, and American are on an African safari when they are captured by cannibals. The cannibal leader addresses them, "I'm sorry gentlemen, but I must follow our traditions."
The Brit replies, "What does that mean?"
The cannibal replies, "We will kill you, eat you, cook you, and make canoes from your skin. But we're not all bad, we'll let you choose your death."
The Brit steps up first and says, "Give me a pistol." He puts it to his head and yells, "God save the Queen!"
Next the Frenchman asks, "Can I have a sword?" As he runs into the sword he yells, "Viva la France!"
Finally, the American asks for a fork. He begins to stab himself repeatedly everywhere. The cannibal leader yells at him, "What in the world are you doing?!"
The American yells, "Good luck with my canoe, assholes!"
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Joke: Mahatma Gandhi spent most of his time barefoot, covering his feet with calluses. He ate very little, which made him frail. His odd diet also gave him bad breath.
What did this make him?
Punch line: A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.