Joke #1239

Joke: A man comes to the entrance of Heaven and is told, "You haven't done anything good, but you haven't done anything bad either. If you can tell me of something amazing you have done, I will let you in."

The man replies, "Well, one time I was driving down the road and I saw some gang members threatening a young lady in an alleyway. I stopped and confronted them. I walked up to the biggest looking dude and slapped him and said, 'You need to leave this young lady alone, or I'm going to kick your ass!'"

The man at the entrance to heaven asked him, "When did this happen?"

The guy replies, "About five minutes ago."

Joke: What's the best part of the new big rig movie?

Joke: My girl is like √-100. She's a 10, but she's also imaginary.

Joke: 2 guys walk on to a bar.One guy says duck. The other guy hit the bar.

Joke: If King Tut had a watchmaker, and that watchmaker had a favorite 80's movie, what would it be?

Joke: Did you know that everybody has a photographic memory?