Good Jokes

Joke: It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may begin plowing."

Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the nine hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class."

Joke: A man goes home and asks his wife, "If I won the lotto, what would you do?"

She replies, "I'd leave you and take half."

The man pulls out a ticket, "I just won $10. Here's five, now get out."

Joke: What did the hardware store owner say to the man that stole copper wire?

Joke: Yo mama's so stupid, she put a quarter in a parking meter and said, "Where is my gumball?!"

Joke: Yo mama's so fat, she has more chins than a Chinese phone book!