Funny Jokes

Joke: Why can't you find any Walmarts in Iraq?

Joke: The preacher at a church is giving a sermon about marriage and how sacred it is. He asks for a volunteer who has been married happily for 50 years. An older man stands and says he is just approaching his 50th anniversary.

The priest asks him how he has managed to stay happy for so long. The man replies, "I do everything I can to keep her happy. But most importantly, I took her to Rome for our 25th anniversary."

The priest replies, "That's great! What do you guys plan on doing on your 50th?"

The man says, "I'm probably going to bring her back."

Joke: A boy comes home from school ecstatic and tells his dad that gay marriage may soon be legal where they live.

His dad asks him, "Why are you so happy? You got a boyfriend?"

His son replies, "It's just the principle dad."

His father shrugs, "At least it's not the priest."

Joke: What do you get when a pirate drops a anchor on his foot

Joke: Two men are working on a telephone pole. A little old lady walks by and one of the men yell to her, "Hey lady, can you move that wire off of the sidewalk for us!"

She picks it up and moves it from the sidewalk. The second electrician says, "I told you it wasn't live."