Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: Three men are sitting on a beach in Jamaica talking about how they all ended up there. The first man says, "I ran a superstore out in California. But business got bad so one day there was a bad fire and I collected the insurance money and moved out here."

The next man says, "I had a Jewelry store in the Midwest. But business went downhill and we were robbed. So I collected the insurance and moved out here."

The final guy says, "I had a little fishery on the East Coast. One day a hurricane hit and I collected the insurance money. I had nothing left but the money so I moved out here."

The other two men look confused for a while then ask him, "How in the world did you start a hurricane?"


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Joke: Mahatma Gandhi spent most of his time barefoot, covering his feet with calluses. He ate very little, which made him frail. His odd diet also gave him bad breath.

What did this make him?


Punch line: A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.


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Joke: Bill Gates was out fishing when his pole started to jiggle. He reels in the fish and the fish asks him, "Please don't eat me, can't you throw me back?"

Bill replies, "Woah, a talking fish! I was going to throw you back anyways."

The fish swims away then turns back, "Now that you let me go, how about a wish?"

Mr. Gates replies, "Okay, what do you want?"


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Joke: What do you call Batman and Robbin after they got steamrolled?


Punch line: Flatman and ribbon!


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Joke: A bear walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "I'll have a gin ... ... ... and tonic."

The bartender replies, "What's with the big pause?"

The bear replies, "I don't know, my dad had them too."


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