Joke: What does a cat say when somebody steps on its tail?

Joke: How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Joke: What did one cow say to the other?

Joke: What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

Joke: Centuries ago in Africa 3 men discover the burial ground of an African tribe. Late one night, the 3 men get caught by the tribesmen looting the burial ground. The 3 men are tied up and surrounded by the tribe until the chief shows up the next day to render their punishment. When the chief shows up he asks the first man, "Death or baguanna?" The man asks the chief, "What's baguanna?" And the chief replies, "Death or baguanna?" The man does not want to die so he chooses baguanna. Every tribesman butt fucks the man and they let him go. The chief asks the second man, "Death or baguanna?"   The man says to himself, "Oh my God, I don't want to die." So he chooses baguanna. Same thing happens to him and they let him go. Chief asks the third man, "Death or baguanna?" The man looks at the entire tribe flipping them all off and says, "Fuck you mother fuckers. No one's fucking me in the ass." So he tells the chief, "l choose death." The chief then says, "O.K. death by baguanna."

Joke: What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?