Joke: What did the police molecule say to the fugitive molecule?

Joke: A frivolous biologist buys too many expensive chemicals and lab equipment. A frivolous engineer buys too much expensive hardware. A frivolous mathematician buys an extra pencil.

Joke: What's the best part about a gypsy on her period?

Joke: A kid is at his interview for a job at a burger joint and is asked "What do you expect to get paid hourly?"

The young man replies "I was thinking about $20 an hour."

The interviewer replies "Okay, we can do that. You can also have one month paid vacation, dental, and medical."

The boy gets excited "Are you joking?!"

The interviewer replies "Yeah, but you started it."

Joke: A police officer came to my house trying to tell me my dog was chasing a kid on a bike.

I told him, "My dog doesn't even have a bike."

Joke: Johnny is on his grandpa's farm in the rabbit enclosure. The ground is covered in rabbit droppings. Johnny asks, "What are all of the pellets on the floor grandpa?"

His grandpa replies, "Oh those? Those are smart pills. You eat them and you get smarter."

Johnny likes the sound of that so he grabs a large handful of them and shoves them into his mouth, "Yuck! Grandpa, these taste like crap."

His grandpa replies, "You're getting smarter already."