Joke: What did the man say when he was cooled to absolute zero?

Joke: What does yeast and a redneck have in common?

Joke: A man got his house painted. When the painters were done they handed him the bill. He was surprised to find that the painters were not charging him for paint, just labor. He asked them, "You did a great job, why didn't you charge me for paint?"

The painter replies, "Don't worry about the paint, it's on the house."

Joke: Why did the semen cross the road?

Joke: Pavlov is sitting in a bar when another patron rings the bell to get in. He gets up and says, "I forgot to feed the dogs," and leaves.

Joke: A man is jogging down the road and he sees a boy eating a candy bar with a ton of wrappers sitting next to him. The man tells him "Kid, it isn't good for you to sit there all day eating candy bars."

The kid scowls at him and says "Hey mister, my grandpa is 98 years old and still walking around."

The jogger asks him "And he sits around eating candy all day?"

The boy replies "No, but he minds his own business."