Joke: A man comes home after being out all night. When he arrives home his wife is glaring at him. She asks him, "Why did you decide to show up at 6 in the morning?"

The man stumbles a bit, and replies "I want some breakfast."

Joke: A man got his house painted. When the painters were done they handed him the bill. He was surprised to find that the painters were not charging him for paint, just labor. He asked them, "You did a great job, why didn't you charge me for paint?"

The painter replies, "Don't worry about the paint, it's on the house."

Joke: Sometimes I think my family is racist. They caught me having sex with a black girl and none of the kids would talk to me. Then my wife told me to pack my bags and go.

Joke: A man climbs into bed and sets a glass of water and aspirin on his wife's bedside table. She tells him, "I don't have a headache."

He replies, "Good, let's fuck!"

Joke: How do small children travel?

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Olive!
Olive who
Olive you!