Joke: When a bear sees Chuck Norris, it tries to make itself look as large as it can.

Joke: Chuck Norris doesn't like his stamps, he stares at them until they wet themselves.

Joke: Yo mama's so stupid she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to turn green.

Joke: Yo mama's so stupid, when somebody broke in and stole the TV she ran outside and yelled to them, "Hey! You forgot the remote!"

Joke: What's the difference between eating pussy and driving through fog?

Joke: When my wife left I got extremely depressed. But then I bought a new TV, a dog, and a Ferrari. I've also had sex with a few women and spent a few thousand dollars at the bar.

She's going to be pissed when she gets home from work.