Joke: Yo mama's so stupid, when she saw a sign that said "Airport Left", she turned around and went home.

Joke: Yo mama's so poor, she got married for the rice.

Joke: A blonde woman fears that her husband has been cheating on her so she goes to the gun shop and buys a pistol. The next day when she comes home from work she finds her husband in bed with another woman. She takes out the gun and puts it to her own head. Her husband yells "Don't shoot yourself!"

She yells back "Shut up! You're next!"

Joke: A blonde, brunette, and a red head are stuck on the roof of a house. Fire fighters are holding a blanket for them to jump onto. They tell the brunette to jump to safety. When she jumps they pull the blanket away and she hurts her butt.

Next the fire fighters tell the red head she needs to jump or she'll never get down. She refuses because she is scared they will pull the blanket away. They tell her "It was an accident." So she jumps and they pull the blanket away. She hurts her butt and yells at them.

Finally the blonde gets smart and tells them "I know what you're going to do. Just lay the blanket on the ground and back away."

Joke: How do you wake Lady Gaga up in the morning?

Joke: Two hillbillies walk into a bar. They are sitting next to a woman who begins to cough violently. One of the men asks her "Are you okay?" The woman shakes her head no.

He promptly lifts her dress and licks one of her butt cheeks. She instantly spasms violently and spits out the food she was choking on. The hillbilly calmly walks back to his table. The other man turns to him and says "I've never actually seen somebody use the hind lick maneuver."