Joke: A man comes home to his wife watching a cooking show and says, "Why are you watching this crap? You can't cook."

She replies, "Well you watch porn."

Joke: Newton's law - "Every action has an equal and opposite reaction."

Cole's law: "Shredded cabbage and carrots makes for a great salad."

Joke: A man joins a golfing tournament, but he is a terrible golfer. Lucky for him an evil leprechaun lives on the course and offers him a deal, "I will make you win this tournament, if you promise to never marry!"

The man agrees and indeed wins the tournament. Afterwards the leprechaun approaches the man, "Remember, you can't marry anybody now!"

Adjusting his collar the priest replies, "Yeah, whatever."

Joke: What two words can open doors for you for the rest of your life?

Joke: What is a Jawa's favorite alcoholic drink?

Joke: A man sitting behind a woman on the bus taps her on the shoulder, "Ma'am, I believe you have semen on the back of your jacket."

She replies, "I'm sure it's not semen. It must be yogurt or something."

He says, "I'm pretty sure I don't ejaculate yogurt."