Joke: A man dies and goes to Heaven. Immediately God explains to him the basics of Heaven, "In Heaven a penny is worth a million dollars and a minute lasts a million years."

The guy says, "Sweet, can I have a penny?"

God replies, "In a minute!"

Joke: What do you call a woman of the church that works at your company?

Joke: A woman walks up to the checkout line at a store with these items: 2% milk, bread, Pepsi, macaroni, and cookies. She sees a drunk man. The man says "You must be single."

The woman is startled. How could he have known? He didn't see her hands and the man couldn't have figured it out from her items. "How did you know?" she asked.

He replied, "Cause your ugly!"

Joke: Yo mama's so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he had to tell you to move.

Joke: Little John and his mother are driving down the road behind a truck carrying sex toys. Suddenly, a huge black dildo flies off of the truck and hits them. Little John asks, "What was that mommy?"

His mommy replies, "A fly."

Little John says, "Woah! Did you see the size of the cock on em'?"

Joke: Did you hear about the new diner on the Moon?