Joke: The captain of a cruise ship has a parrot. Him and his parrot go to the magic show on board every night. and every night the parrot calls the magician out on his trickery , "It's up his sleeve!", "There is a hole in his hat!", "There's a fake bottom!"

So finely one day the magician gets so fed up with the parrot he pulls out a gun, shoots at the bird, misses the bird and hits the boiler. This causes the ship to blow up into bits.

The magician grabs onto a piece of floating wood and the parrot lands on his shoulder. The parrot looks at him and says, "I give up, where's the boat?"

Joke: Have you heard that kangaroos can jump higher than a two-story house?

Joke: Why are blowjobs from midgets the best?

Joke: A guy is driving through the countryside. He looks over at a hill and sees a shepherd fucking a sheep in broad daylight. He yells, "Hey! Where I come from, we sheer 'em!"

The shepherd, without pausing from his activities yells back "Sheer 'em? You can get yer own damn sheep!"

Joke: A Rabbi and a Priest walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What?! If this is some sort of joke you have to leave!" So they both walk out.

A few minutes later a chicken walks into the bar. The bartender yells, "Come on! We don't even serve chickens!"

The chicken asks, "Do you know anywhere that does?"

The bartender replies, "Yeah... It's right across the road."

Joke: You know why a war on drugs is a bad idea?