Joke: A young boy named Connor walks in on his father putting a condom on. He asks his dad, "What are you doing?!"

His father says, "Oh, I'm looking for a mouse."

Connor replies, "Why? Are you going to fuck it?"

Joke: A man and his wife were having financial troubles so they decide she should work the streets to make some extra money.

She comes home that night with $31.25. He asks her, "Who the hell gave you a quarter?"

She replies, "All of them."

Joke: Little Connor is at school and his teacher asks, "Do you know any words with multiple syllables?"

Connor raises his hand and says, "Mas-tur-bate."

The teacher frowns and says, "Well yes Connor. That's quite the mouthful."

Little Connor replies, "No, that's fal-lat-io."

Joke: Why don't most buildings have a 13th floor?

Joke: A man smells his wife making his favorite cookies as he is about to die. He decides to crawl downstairs to get one final treat before he goes. As he reaches for one of the cookies his wife smacks his hand with the spatula, "No! Those are for the funeral."

Joke: Mississippi, how do you spell it?