Blonde Jokes

 

8 ratings
0 saves

Joke: What do you call a dead blonde in a closet?


Punch line: The winner of last year's hide-and-go-seek game.


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6 ratings
1 saves

Joke: What should you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?


Punch line: Run as fast as you can, she has a grenade in her mouth.


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23 ratings
6 saves

Joke: A blind man walks into a bar and sits for a while with nobody talking to him. He says "Anybody want to hear a blonde joke?"

The bartender tells him "Before you tell it I just want to let you know there is a cage fighting blonde on one side of you and a large blonde softball player on the other side. I'm also a blonde and I can bench 300 pounds. Do you still want to tell that joke?"

The blind man replies "Obviously not! I don't have time to explain the joke 3 times."


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74 ratings
24 saves

Joke: A blonde, brunette, and red head are waiting in front of the pearly gates when God comes out to greet them "Usually I wouldn't let any of you girls in, but I'm having a good day. I'll give you all a deal. If you can climb my 1000 stair staircase and listen to a joke at each step without laughing I'll let you in." They all agree.

The brunette loses at the 100th step. The red head loses at the 500th step. The blonde makes it to the 999th step and begins to laugh historically. God asks her "You were so close, why did you laugh?"

She replies "I just got the first one."


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21 ratings
6 saves

Joke: A blonde walks into a New York bank and asks for a $1,000 loan for a month long trip to Asia. The loan officer tells her "You are going to need some collateral if you want a loan."

The blonde tells him "I'll leave my Rolls Royce, it's worth $200,000." The bank accepts the security and laughs at her for leaving such an expensive car for such a small loan.

When she comes back from her trip she goes to the bank and repays her loan plus interest, coming to $1,020. The bank manager smirks at her and asks "We know you are a millionaire, why would you get such a small loan and use such an expensive car for collateral?"

The blonde looks at him and smiles "Where else can I park my car in the city for a month for $20?"


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