11 ratings
3 saves

Joke: One day a teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that every Friday she will ask a question to the class and whoever answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.

On the first Friday the teacher asks: "How many grains of sand are on the beach?" needless to say, no one could answer.

The following Friday, the teacher asks the class: "How many stars are in the sky?" and again no one could answer. Frustrated little Johnny decides that the next Friday he would somehow answer the question and get a 3 day weekend.

So Thursday night Johnny takes 2 ping pong balls and paints them black. The next day he brings them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day just when the teacher says, "here's this week's question," Johnny empties the bag onto the floor sending the ping pong balls rolling to the front of the room. The entire class starts laughing.

The teacher says, "Okay, who's the comedian with the black balls?"

Immediately, little Johnny stands up and says, "Bill Cosby, see ya on Tuesday!"


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38 ratings
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Joke: Even if Chuck Norris got a sex change, he would still be the man.


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11 ratings
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Joke: Two men are working on a telephone pole. A little old lady walks by and one of the men yell to her, "Hey lady, can you move that wire off of the sidewalk for us!"

She picks it up and moves it from the sidewalk. The second electrician says, "I told you it wasn't live."


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9 ratings
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Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Euripides!
Euripides who?
Euripides pants and I'm gonna be mad!


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7 ratings
2 saves

Joke: One day, a mathematician decides he wants to be a firefighter. So he quits his job and applies to be a firefighter. But the chief doesn't think he is qualified so he gives him a test. He takes him to the alley and sets a dumpster on fire. He asks the mathematician, "What do you do?" The mathematician immediately grabs a hose and puts out the fire.

The chief then asks him, "Now that the fire is out, what do you do?"

Stumped, the mathematician thinks for a minute and says "I can reduce this problem into a problem with known solutions." With this he pulls out a match and sets the dumpster on fire.


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18 ratings
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Joke: Tom and John are hanging out. Tom asks John, "It's fuckin' freezin' in here. Can you get me my fuckin' slippers?"

John goes upstairs to get the slippers and he comes across Tom's hot 21-year-old twin sisters. He tells them, "Your brother told me to have sex with both of you."

One of the sisters replies, "Prove it!"

John yells downstairs, "Tom! Both of them?!."

Tom yells back, "Of course! What's the point of fuckin' one?!."


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