Dirty Jokes

 

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Joke: How does Jackie Chan masturbate?


Punch line: He just jacket-off


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Joke: A young couple gets married. They have their wedding and reception. When all the guests have gone, they go up to their room to have sex for the first time. Neither of them have ever had sex before so they both sit nervously on the bed. Finally the wife says okay honey, if you want to have sex with me grab my left tit but if you don't squeeze my right. This gives the new husband and idea so he says to her, ok honey, if you want to have sex with me grab my dick but if you don't, pull on it 55 times or more.


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Joke: What did God say when he saw Eve taking a bath in the ocean?


Punch line: "DAMMIT! Now I'll never get that smell outta the fish!"


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Joke: What word is better for a woman than a pizza?


Punch line: Moist


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Joke: What word is better for a pizza than a woman?


Punch line: Crust


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