Joke: Two college kids that have never tried drugs before decide they're going to buy some on a friday night. They get caught with them and spend the weekend in jail. On Monday morning they go before the judge. They have never been in trouble before and did not have a criminal record. The judge looks them both in the eyes and asks, So I suppose you boys are trying to make a career out of doing drugs now? NO, NO we're not! They both cried out. So the judge thinks about it for a second and then says, I'm going to cut you boys a break. Here's what I want you to do. I want you both to come back in 20 days. And in 20 days time between the two of you, I want you to have found 20 of your College friends that you have talked out of doing drugs and into staying in college. Can you do that? Yes, yes your Honor. They both reply. Then one of the boys asks, How are we supposed to do that? Well I've heard of a big circle little circle method the judge answered but you'll have to go online and figure that out yourselves. Come back and see me in 20 days.(the Judge's gavel comes smacking down) When they come back 20 days later the judge asked the first kid, So how did you do?He answers, (cont. in Punch line below)
Punch line: ( cont.) Your honor, I personally got 30 students to quit doing drugs and stay in school. The judge says that's Great! How did you do it? I did the big circle little circle method. First I drew the big circle and I told them, This is your brain before you do drugs. Then I drew the little circle and told them, This is your brain after you do drugs. That's when the other kid stood up yelling you did the wrong one. The judge looks at him and asks how many students did he get to quit doing drugs and stay in school? He answered, Your honor I personally got over 200 students to quit doing drugs and stay in school. The judge is ecstatic and says that's GREAT!!! How did you do it? The student explains that he did the big circle little circle method as well. Then he went on to explain that he drew the little circle first and told them, This is your butt hole before you go to prison, ....
Joke: A teacher was teaching her second grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and ask his what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, "Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the work force, you are the people and your baby brother is the future." "I still don't get it" responded the Little Johnny. "Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better," said the dad. "Okay then...good night" said Little Jonny went off to bed. In the middleof the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole he saw his mom loudly snoring, buthis dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized somethingand thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the work force, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, andthe future is full of shit!"
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Joke: So Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says "teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But beforeclass ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the studentsclear out, Johnny makes his guess. "Blue." "Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear. "Well come with me out to my dads car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out. When they get to the car she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: "That mother fucker! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your pussy before the end of the day!"
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