Three men and a beautiful woman

Joke: Three men were told by God, " If you step on a duck, you shall marry the ugliest woman. However, if you do not step on a duck, you shall marry the most beautiful woman in all the land." The three men accepted. The first man stepped on a duck from not paying attention. The second man accidentally stepped on a duck in his son's room. The third man never stepped on a duck yet he was married to an ugly woman. He exclaims to God, "I have not stepped on a duck, why is my wife ugly?" Why has God given him an ugly wife?

Joke: What's the best part of the new big rig movie?

Joke: My girl is like √-100. She's a 10, but she's also imaginary.

Joke: 2 guys walk on to a bar.One guy says duck. The other guy hit the bar.

Joke: If King Tut had a watchmaker, and that watchmaker had a favorite 80's movie, what would it be?

Joke: Did you know that everybody has a photographic memory?