Blonde Jokes

 

34 ratings
5 saves

Joke: A blonde girl is at a ventriloquist act. The ventriloquist starts to tell a bunch of blonde jokes and everybody in the room is laughing hysterically.

The blonde girl stands up and yells "Hey jerk! Not all blondes are dumb. You need to stop with the cheap jokes!"

The ventriloquist says "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

The blonde interrupts him "Stay out of it! I was talking to the little man on your leg."


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58 ratings
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Joke: What do you call a smart blonde?


Punch line: A golden retriever.


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20 ratings
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Joke: A blonde, brunette and a red head are stuck on an island; but they see land in the distance and decide to swim to it.

The brunette swims 1/4 of the way but can't continue and decides to turn back.

The red head swims 1/3 of the way but can't continue and decides to turn back.

The blonde swims 1/2 of the way but decides she can't continue and swims back to the island.


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Joke: A blonde girl is standing next to her school's flagpole. The janitor comes up to her and asks her what she's doing. She replies "I have to find the height of the flagpole for math class."

With this the janitor unscrews the flagpole and lays it down on the ground. He measures it with a measuring tape and tells her "Twenty-five feet, five inches."

She thanks him but as he is walking away she says "What a dummy. I wanted the height, not the width."


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13 ratings
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Joke: A blonde girl takes her goldfish to the vet and tells the vet "I think my goldfish is having seizures."

The vet looks into the bowl, "Looks fine to me."

The girl snaps back at him, "Hold on! Let me get him out of his bowl first!"


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